30 THINGS YOU WILL NEVER HEAR MEN SAY:

1. I think Barry Manilow is one cool motherfucker.

2. No, I don't want another beer. I have to work tomorrow.

3. Her tits are just way too big.

4. Sometimes I just want to be held.

5. That Rosie O'Donnell chick gives me a boner.

6. Sure! I'd love to wear a condom.

7. We haven't been to the mall in ages, let's go shop and I'll
hold your purse.

8. Screw Monday Night Football, let's watch "Ally McBeal".

9. It's late. Put your clothes back on and I'll take you home.

10. Honey, I'm going to the store, do you need more tampons?

11. I know you just blew me, but I need a kiss.

12. I'm sick of beer, give me a fruit juice with a lemon twist.

13. Great, your mother's coming to stay with us again.

14. I wonder if my gorgeous neighbor knows that her drapes are
open when she's getting ready for bed? Maybe I should tell her.

15. No way, you weeded the garden last week. It's my turn.

16. Better get rid of these old Penthouse magazines. I don't look
at them anymore.

17. I understand.

18. This movie has way too much nudity.

19. Damn, we're late for church!

20. No! I don't want to see your sister's new tits.

21. Damn these onions, pass me a tissue.

22. Put some panties on for Christ's sake.

23. Eat something!! You are starting to look like a Victoria's
Secret model!!

24. Don't pick that up, I got it.

25. Happy Anniversary!!!

26. Hey, isn't today your mothers birthday?

27. Let's talk, I miss talking.

28. Gay men have rights too!

29. I am just too tired to have sex again today!

30. Are you losing weight, sweetie?

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